Help for Parents of Troubled Teens
Many parents of troubled teens think their is no help in raising their rebellious child. Abundant Life Preparatory is a powerful Christian boarding school that offers hope, and help for parents of troubled teens. The typical parents of the Abundant Life Preparatory struggling teen are believers who love Jesus with all their hearts. Due to a deep love, these parents of troubled teens are willing do anything for their children, willing to sacrifice everything for them. Though struggling to know God’s will in some areas, these parents are committed to God and are completely willing to follow Him. They have faith in Jesus Christ, King of Kings, but many are still holding on to their troubled child… in vain. Typical Abundant Life Preparatory parents of troubled teens may be having a difficult time giving their child over to God. Most Abundant Life Preparatory parents believe in the power of prayer, they go to church, may attend Bible study during the week, and tithe regularly. They have taken their troubled teens to church and are determined to raise their family in a Christian environment; yet trouble has come with their troubled teen, and most of them are truly asking, “what went wrong?” We offer help for mother, and father of troubled teens.
Obviously, if a troubled teen is being considered to be sent to a Christian boarding school for troubled teens, a problem must exist. If there were no problems they would not be considering an out-of-home placement for their child. Still, the question of “why” lingers. “Why us”, they ask? “Why is this happening?” they say. Many surrounding this family ask the same question. Most of the time the “troubled teen” has developed his/her problems over a period of time, and it will take some time to turn the situations around. The solution will require some change in the troubled teen, the mother, and father.
Most of the time, we find that one, or both, of the mother, and father are “rescuers”. This means that at least one of the parents is taking on a great deal of the responsibility for the child’s poor choices. The child rarely feels the effect of their poor choice because the parent rescues them from the consequences of their actions. Therefore, the child continues to make poor choices. The message the rescuing parent sends the child is, “I don’t like what you are doing but I will bail you out.” The other parent (hard parent) usually tries to compensate for the rescuing parent and by exerting harsh external control, only making the problem worse.
Here is the problem… if the mom, or dad are not in one accord on everything as it pertains to the family, the children, and the discipline, the child will find the way to triangulate, causing division between the mother, and father and thus, allowing strife to enter the marriage. If the parents are not in one mind on all areas regarding “parenting”, then the child will most usually find a way to drive a wedge between them, dividing and provoking the parents to turn against one another. In the meantime, the child continues to push the envelope and act out of control. If one parent tends to be soft (inconsistent, and taking on the responsibility of the consequence) and the other parent is hard (holds a tough line and is harsh in regard to discipline), there will be conflict that will make trouble for the entire family. There needs to be a solution, which will necessitate change both mother, and father, and in the child.